Sunday, October 19, 2008

A sudden realization.

I am unemployable... Its sad I guess. But I think that it is also good. I want to be my own boss! I love cooking, and one day I will open my own resturant. On the other hand I love making videos, and one day I will have my own production studio... I've got it! I will put my two passions together and make my own online cooking show called "Cam-Can-Cook". That would be the best of both worlds as far as Im concerned. So that settles it then. I'll do it.

You might ask yourself why you should give a fuck about what I want to do, and quite frankly, I would be saying the same thing about myself if I could stand back and see what a jerk-off I can be sometimes. Let me explain.

I have about 10 years of cooking experience that I gained when I was growing up in my Mom and Stepfathers resturant. I started as a dishwasher. Probably the hardest job in the whole industry. And from there I worked my way up to become a cook. Then my parents decided they had enough of the non stop work of the resturant, and they sold.

Over the next five years of my life I had about 50 different fucking jobs that ranged from construction to telemarketing. Very rarely I would work for one place longer than six months. There were however some great lessons learned during this time. Most of the lessons came from learning that working for some one else is a lot harder than working for yourself, or your parents for that matter.

At this time in my life, I was drinking excessively, experimenting with drugs almost every fucking day, and to top it off I was living above a Nightclub call "The Mountain view Hotel". I dont know if you can call this part of my life hitting rock bottom, but I will tell you this, as the great Gorden Ramsay would say, "I hadn't a pot to piss in". ( I would never suggest pissing on pot, especially not if your going to smoke it. )

So to recap, I was a drunk, unemployed drug attic for lack of a better description, and as if things couldnt have got any worse, I got a girl pregnant.

At the time, I had no idea what I was going to do. I didnt love this girl, even though I told her that I did. Im a fuckning asshole, and after 4 months of dating and trying to make it work, we decided to call it quits. Thats when I met the love of my life.

Angela was her name, and I instantly fell in love with her. She was perfect in my eyes. We met at Montana's resturant in Collingwood Ontario. The resturant had just opened, while I was going through all of this crap. And to my surprise, it was this resturant that changed my life.

I was a server and Angela was a hostess, the perfect combination for getting great tables sat at your section every shift. I made a killing serving tables. I loved the entertainment factor that I could bring to each and every guest. Making them laugh and giving them great service was always top priority. Things were going extremely well, and Angela was even ok with the idea that I was still having a baby with another woman.

Michelle was the other woman, and we had talked about abortion and adoption, but never went through with it. I can not be more thankful for that, because in July of 2005, Michelle gave birth to my 1st daughter, Bianca.

I usually tell people that Bianca, who is now 3 years old, is really the one who made me smarten the fuck up. And because of her, my drinking stopped, and so did my excessive drug use. And just last month, Angela gave birth to my second daughter, Liberty.

For the last three years I have mostly worked in resturants, under many different chefs. I have learnt so many new and exciting things. However, I still cannot keep a full time job very long. I am un-employable, and it is because I am passionate, and I dont put up with shit from anyone. Just as early as yesterday, I told my sous chef to fuck off because I didnt like the way she was talking to me. How dare a 19 year old girl treat me like Im a fucking idiot. And to give you an example, the other day she asked my if I knew how to make a grilled cheese. I mean come on, could you be any more condisending? She had it coming to her. If there is one thing I have learnt over the last ten years, that is this, "Treat people how you want to be treated". You have to respect your kitchen staff or no one will want to work with you.

I respect my kitchen staff and one day Angela and I will own the best resturant to be employed in. Where everyone from dishwasher right up to executive chef will be treated the same... With respect.

I hope this first post will give you some insight into my life, so you know where I have come from and where I am now, but most importantly, where I am going. Stay tuned for "Cam-can-Cook", first recipe coming soon.